When I was a "naive" little bugger, in the early 60's, a not so popular uncle of mine used to tell a story about how, long ago in a land far away, as the sun was about to set on a certain village sitting on the coastline, was threatened by marauders with an armada of ships with cannons aimed at the tiny village.
The village headman was in a predicament as the villagers pleaded with him to find a solution before dawn as to defend their village from certain doom and plunder. In the midst of the imminent invasion in the morrow, the village-folks huddled and whispered with fear amongst themselves, when the village drunk staggered over to the now frightened headman and whispered a stupid but bold plan in his ear. Immediately the headman gathered all the menfolk and told the women and children to go into their huts for safety and pray for divine intervention.
That night village head taking a chance on the drunkard's nonsensical advice the told all the menfolk to strip naked and with a brush and some chalk powder painted white circles on their buttocks. Under camouflage of darkness the headman lined the entire beach with the men with painted buttocks bent over facing the ships at dawn. With the break of dawn and the sun behind his back the captain of the ships through his primitive achromatic lenses atop his watch-tower was shocked to see the entire beach lined with "cannons" staring back at his fleet. Immediately he barked an order to stand-down and retreat as he knew for certain his flotilla was no match to that many "cannons" the villagers had assembled in retaliation.
Thus the village was spared, thanks to a certain village drunk who saved the day .....and the people lived happily ever after....!
Moral of this silly fictional rubbish story churned out by my late and always "inebriated" uncle of mine....makes me now want to believe this story was for real and being drummed again and again into the heads of those "butt-teasers" in front of Ambiga's house recently. In all their years in the military that butt-mooning was a sure-proof way to defend king and country ! Hahahaha ! What imbeciles !
Have a fruitful Sunday now folks....I dunno if I'll be able to stop laughing till Monday !!....hahahahahahahaha....hic...hahahahahahahah..hic...hahahahaha...hahahahahaha...choke...hahahaha .....hic...hic....choke...hic........
7 comments:
Twas good that the many many you had last night brought back stories told. But your tale was mighty relevant. The butt chief paid thousands for his datukship....bought, not deserved. When you use your backside rather than your brains you need to pay for datukship crutches! Buying these should be banned to preserve the integrity of royal patronage.
But those stupid buffons,when they bend over have their pants torn wide open.As these pondans weren't wearing panties their red asses outshined their darkened butts.Luckily for them the real buffons were not there.Or else the real buffons were to have a field day.Banging the asses of these human buffons.
Army veterans.What army veterans.The chief of the armed forces would not know where to hide his blushed red and purple face if he was there.Then what about the families of these buffons of veterans.They will be too ashamed to acknowledged that these were their very loving grandparents,parents and family members.Hahaha,these buffons are ignorant that they were actually borned morons.
The butts cif : " ambiga tak mau lagi 4.0 .....semua olang terima kasih aku lor !"
Best amusing story I have heard in a long time. But these Be End Asses will not understand the story.
'Instant' Bumiputras from Indonesia who did not participate in our struggle for Medeka have today more rights and privileges than we ethnic Chinese and Indian citizens who can trace our domicile in the country to several generations before their arrival on our shores. Similarly, the status of the 60,000 illegal Muslim immigrants from Thailand has through some sleight of hand trick been regularized and 'bumiputrarized' too so that they also enjoy a range of privileges and benefits denied to us. Now, where is the justice in all this? Moo can try to ingratiate himself with the Chinese but this absurd division of Malaysian society into Bumiputras and non Bumiputras exposes UMNO's fascistic agenda. We have no time to waste but to take the discrimination we suffer to the International Court of Justice for a resolution.
A long time ago when I was a kid looking at the throngs of people scampering up the MS Rajula at the Penang port, I was told this story by my pa'ji when I asked how Bombay (now Mumbai) got it's name.
Back then, I thought my pa'ji was just making up the story to amuse me .....now that I read it here, i realised it must have been in the folklore ...
I've read some good stuff here. Definitely worth bookmarking for revisiting.
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