As my late Amachee will say..."No Geography" pt. II

Below I re-produce a letter by a Malaysian lady I guess and by God, whose name I cannot remember now, enjoy this piece of government servant "slap-stick" reality. I nicked it off from the net a few months ago and I wish someone here will help in crediting that person. And to our dumb Education minister Mazlee, you certainly are a bloody CHIMP old chap  ! Now read on.....

My recent  experience  in Malaysia applying for Malaysian  citizenship for my daughter has left me with  some  mixed feelings about the quality of people in the civil service there. They were kind, approachable and courteous; but their level of ignorance about the world left me flabbergasted and concerned. 😓😓😓

1. I'd written in my daughter's  application form that we were residing  in the United Kingdom. The first clerk asks her colleague : "takde  United Kingdom dalam sistem, guna apa?"

2nd clerk replies, "Cuba United Kingdom of Amerika." 

Both then turn to me,  "Puan,  takde United Kingdom dalam sistem, boleh letak United Kingdom  of Amerika, ke? " 

I say to them, "itu United States  of America.  Kalau takde United Kingdom, guna Great Britain." 
"Puan, Great Britain pun takde, cuma Britain.". 

"Gunalah Britain. kalau takde Britain, gunalah England!". 

So they select "Britain " in their computer system.

2.Tempat lahir: - I'd  written, "Cambridge,  Cambridgeshire ".

"Puan, mana hospital ini?  Mesti  tulis  nama hospital. "

So I show her the birth certificate,  "Rosie  maternity hospital, Cambridge. Cambridgeshire."

"Tak boleh.  Puan. Potong yang ini  dan tulis nama hospital. Lepas sain  di  tepi,."

3. Place of first entry into Malaysia, I'd  followed the date stamp in my daughter's passport, "KL International".

"Salah ni, Puan. Mesti tulis 'airport'. 

To which i showed  her the stamp in my daughter's  passport. I replied to her, "kalau tulis airport aje,  Malaysia  banyak airport." "Tapi I ikut cakap engkau. Tambah perkataan 'airport' dalam borang".

4. I'd  brought both my Malaysian birth certs, as the sponsoring parent and both my daughter's  UK  birth certs.

"Puan, nombor  sijil lahir mana ni?"

So I replied,  "gunalah nombor siri official. Satu sijil lahir  sementara dari hospital and satu sijil lahir  rasmi yang datang kemudian. Malaysia pun begini ". Show her both my Malaysian  birth certs. "Oh ya, Malaysia  pun begini". She happily copies the number from the official  UK register  of births and deaths.

5. Race and ethnicity question.  There are only 4 options: Melayu, India, Cina, Lain2.

I state my daughter as Lain2 (campuran).

"Eh, Puan. Takde kategori campuran".

So I reply, "orang Senoi kahwin Cina macam  mana? Kadazan kahwin Cina ? "

She said, "Kalau semenanjung,  boleh ikut bapa atau mak . Kalau Sabah dan Sarawak, ikut bapa"

I reply, "tapi anak  saya memang campuran. Separuh Cina,  separuh  Inggeris."

"Tak boleh, Puan. Mesti pilih  satu aje".

"Kalau  begini, tulislah ikut saya, sebab  saya warganegara  Malaysia, letak  'Cina'.

So we see now how the racial policies continue to be perpetuated in Malaysia, and we are no where closer to becoming an integrated Malaysian race.😭

6. Worst of all. 3 clerks picked up my daughter's  passport, looked at the cover and then asked me, "ini paspot Amerika, ke?"

Do they  not read? The words, "United Kingdom of Great Britain  and Ireland" and the British crest is emblazoned  on the front!!! What has happened to geography lessons in school?😧

 This leaves me wondering if my first application for my daughter's  Malaysian  citizenship  failed because of ineptitude in the civil service. That application took them 3 years to process and to reply.

When I asked at Kementerian Luar  Negeri concerning doing an appeal towards that rejection, the reply was , "Kami tak terima rayuan, buat  applikasi baru di Jabatan Pendaftaran Negara. (JPN)."😟

So this latest  application at JPN is posted to have at least 12 months processing time now, according to their public service notice.

7. Worst of all, when the end was in site, the clerk failed to take a clear fingerprint from my 4 year old daughter. The thumb print  smudged  on the completed form, she ran off to her supervisor in a tizzy. Came back and said, "minta  maaf la Puan. Kena buat semula borang ini."

Total process took a day's  travel to KLN, Putrajaya and JPN, Putrajaya. Then another day at JPN  Kampar, Perak.

By the way, if you are making photocopies  for this application, do remember  to reduce your UK marriage certificate to A4 size as they rejected my A3 photocopy  and sent me out to get another  one done in A4 size.😩 also, remember to write 'tiada' in any blank line in the form,  or they will return it to you.

Cheers to you..... who-ever you are !