In view of the recent world-wide Stock Exchange crash, my friend John W.( with input from another W. (not a relative!) half-way across the universe ) came up with some classics which I am gloomily sharing with you...... for the "lighter side" for the week-end......thanks John !!
SHARES IN BRIEF
Malayan Rubber Industries - slipped (baby boom likely)
QANTAS - plunge averted
Olympic High Board - takes a dive
Humpty Dumpty - great fall
Obama Dems - dark daze ahead
Paul Simon & Art Garfunkel - Slip Slidin' Away
Elastic Inds - hold for long stretch
Wet 'n Wild - slippery slope
eBay - sell, sell, sell
Starbucks - off the boil
Avril Lavigne - falling to pieces
Jaguar - headed south
HongKong Tailors - bottomed out
Shell - in turmoil
Airship Industries - blown away
KLG - not a spark
McPalin - Receivers called in
AirAsia - heavily discounted
Meikok & Yaws - heading-up (data check requested)
General Motors - driven down
Speedie Tugging - blow-out expected
Virgin - eagerly sought.................... and my personal favorite....
Malaysian Government Inc. - laughing stock
and finally a joke....................
Judge Judy to prostitute, 'So when did you realize you were raped?'Prostitute, wiping away tears, 'When the cheque bounced.'
3 comments:
LOOK FORWARD TO MORE s'exchange commentaries.
BAD-ARE-WE P/M - trading suspended
MONGOLIAN MODELS INC - blown away
Someone sent me this:
CEO --Chief Embezzlement Officer.
CFO-- Corporate Fraud Officer.
BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.
BEAR MARKET -- A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.
VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.
P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.
BROKER -- What my broker has made me.
STANDARD & POOR -- Your life in a nutshell.
STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock.
STOCK SPLIT -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets
equally between themselves.
FINANCIAL PLANNER -- A guy whose phone has been disconnected.
MARKET CORRECTION -- The day after you buy stocks.
CASH FLOW-- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.
YAHOO -- What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.
WINDOWS -- What you jump out of when you're the sucker who bought
Yahoo @ $240 per share.
INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR -- Past year investor who's now locked up in a nuthouse.
PROFIT -- An archaic word no longer in use.
-doreen-
dat joke bout judge judy is really funny.....! Baa Haa Haa!
Gud 1 mate :-)
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